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Just trying to help you for Halloween. Costumes that seem like a good idea…but aren’t.


1. One of those full-body, painted-on costumes. Someone spills a cocktail and you could have a major wardrobe malfunction.

2. The Snuggie. You’d be warm and cozy all night, but there’s no way you’re getting any action in that thing.

3. Heidi Montag. It’s easy to strap on a bridal veil and a swine flu mask and pretend to be Heidi, but the risk of being hit on by a Spencer Pratt wannabe is just too much.

4. Any type of Lycra catsuit. Far too challenging in terms of bathroom breaks.

5. Kate Gosselin. The reverse-mullet wig is bound to be in costume shops this year, but resist the urge.

6. Paris Hilton. Too easy.

7. Anything edible. You may think it’s cute to sew candy necklaces or gummy rings to your outfit, but you won’t like it when people start chewing on you.

8. A pun. It may seem clever, but explaining yourself is going to get irritating after the 16th person asks you what your costume is.

9. Sarah Palin. Dressing up as the former governor of Alaska is so last year.

10. A sexy nurse, maid, or cop in an XXS. We get it, you want to show some skin. Play it safe and go with the XS. You’re going to freeze either way.

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