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Aquarius: You can low key be like the BIGGEST HATER, in your friend group. If you keep being so antisocial then before you know it your friends are gonna be some random people on Chatroulette like it’s 2009 again.

Pisces: You have the emotional backbone of a Twinkie. It’s time to stop being so soft and feeling so bad for yourself! Your friends never wanna drink with you anymore cause they know you’re gonna end up in tears over nothing.

Aries: you are ALWAYS trying to take claim over cute people before your friends to, and that’s left them HIGH & DRY with literally no one to choose from while you’re over there trying to juggle like 9 people on Snapchat, bumble, and Instagram dm’s.

Taurus: you can be INSANELY possessive over your friends. You hate for them to have any other friends besides you so you will literally sabotage their other relationships. It’s completely BIZARRE.

Gemini: you’ve gotta hop off the dating apps and actually socialize with real life people around you. You have carpal tunnel in your thumbs from swiping so much. You are so addicted you actually tried to swipe left on your boss when he was telling you something you didn’t agree with.

Cancer: winning over your trust is more complicated than this whole Yanny vs laurel thing. You make people go through insane obstacles and then you still just hack into their twitter and texts to read the dm’s and messages but you’ve literally never found anything. Your the worlds worst detective.

Leo: Oh leo, you can be such the fun light of the group, but the second the spotlight gets off of you and onto someone else it’s literally off with their heads. Remember your squad doesn’t always have to revolve around you.

Virgo: you are in a constant state of worry and it stresses out the people around you. You are the type of person that makes like 3 small tasks seem like you have an overload of things you have to get done and you stress out about it but refuse to ask the people around you for help, it’s time to chill.

Libra: you absolutely loveeee sharing, which is amazing, but you also don’t always no how to say no. So when your gross roommate asks to borrow your razor, underwear, oh and your significant other, you should really start saying no.

Scorpio: you are one sneaky mofo. You’re like an FBI agent the way you can eavesdrop and look through people’s stuff without any trace. People love being your friend bc you literally are full of everyone else’s secrets.  

Sagittarius: you are so amazingly passionate and get SUPER hyped up with grand ideas and things you’re gonna do but then you also remember there’s a new episode of This Is Us is on and it’s happy hour at Arby’s and easily forget about your life changing ideas.

Capricorn: you can sometimes be the parent of the group aka the boner of the group which really just brings the whole crowd down. Yeah it’s amazing for that one time your friend almost got arrested for peeing on the side of the bar and you could rationalize with the cops out of it, but that’s literally like the only time it’s been actually useful.

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