This is CRAZY!

Is it possible to control who we fall in love with? I used to say “No,” but this might have proven me wrong!

Over 20 years ago, a psychologist named Dr. Arthur Aron succeeded in making 2 people FALL IN LOVE in his lab. Seriously, we are talking 2 strangers who walked in different doors, met face to face in his lab and 6 months later THEY WERE MARRIED.

South Africa, Cape Town, Bride and groom sitting on wall

Source: Yuri Arcurs / Getty

And it was after they asked each other 36 questions followed up by 4 minutes of silently looking into each other’s eyes.

Yes, I’m about to share the questions with you JUST IN CASE you want to try it out, but first, does it actually work? Well, apparently so, because NY Times writer Mandy Len Catron tried it out herself and guess what? You guessed it: she’s now IN LOVE with the man she did the experiment with (and yes, the feelings are mutual).

Lipstick kiss on white background, close-up

Source: Davies and Starr / Getty

Read about her experience HERE.

Alrighty, now….ON WITH THE QUESTIONS! (Forewarning, they get more and more personal as you go along).


Set I

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?

4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?

7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?

8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.

12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

Set II

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?

15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

16. What do you value most in a friendship?

17. What is your most treasured memory?

18. What is your most terrible memory?

19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?

20. What does friendship mean to you?

21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.

23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?


25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling … “

26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share … “

27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.

28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.

29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.

30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.

32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?

34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?

35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?

36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

THAT’S IT! Well…don’t forget to silently look into each other’s eyes for 4 minutes.

Newlywed Groom Kisses a Bride Holding a Bouquet on Her Cheek

Source: Digital Vision. / Getty

Let me know how it goes lovebirds!!!


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