(Via BestWeekEver.tv)

This is a Recap of Lost Season 6, Episode 15, entitled “Across The Sea”, originally airing May 11, 2010. It is full of spoilers about things I did not understand and spoiled explanations about why I did not understand them. So don’t read on if you DVRed me being confused, cause it’ll be ruined.

We open on a shipwreck. Quickly, a survivor comes to the surface — Frank?? Ahh, crap, it’s just some ancient woman who probably didn’t deliver a calm one-liner when her ship exploded. She stumbles to the island, all kinds of super pregnant, and is briefly startled but soon taken in by the island’s lone resident, veteran character actress Allison “Juno’s Mom” Janney.

Turns out they’re speaking Latin, so we are flashing WAY the hell back, and the woman immediately goes into laborus majorus (the Latin phrase for “to kill grain”) and with the help of mysterious island mom, delivers her one and only baby, Jacob. But wait! Turns out, she wasn’t pregnant with one baby and also fat, but she was pregnant with twins! Who’s the other kid? Hurley? It’s Hurley, right? She delivers the mysterious afterthought and is like, “I don’t have a name for this dude, you want him? Actually wait, no, lemmie see him real quick.” Island woman glares at the two babies, and whoaboy, she’s feelin’ something (memories of Penny? Or something EEEEEVIILLLLLL???)

The island woman realizes that the opening titler is coming up, so she hurries up and smashes the mother with a rock, because cool! Shipwreck woman just learned Island Rule #1: Finders keepers, losers weepers! Island Rule #2: THERE ARE NO RULES!!! Island Rule #3: Ignore Rule #2, there are actually so many rules on the island, and you must impart them to the twins you just stole.

Also, the kids are symbolic as all hell:

Jacob and Bro play a round of Rocks: The Game, the family breaks up, and the origin of the smoke monster is totally, clearly explained HERE.

[Source: BestWeekEver.tv]

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